Love the one who's loving you..
Tuesday, February 20, 20075:50 PM
Nothing much happened over the weekends. Syad came to my place yesterday.. I needed to borrow his lappy. And so, he came over just to pass me that. And oh! To check my sick pc too.. Sad to say, nothing could be done to that pc.. Unless i have the money to repair it, again.. I have to keep in mind that i can't chat at nights.. Talk to my dearests.. Surfing the net.. etc.. Nevermind all that. Things happened for a reason. For example, i'm using Syad's lappy now to finish up stupid online tests and do blogging. Heh. Thanks sweetie. You're the best. =)
Anyways, mama planned to catch a movie. Unfortunately, when we reached the destination, the queue was horribly long.. So, we planned on just having dinner.. And yah, Syad was with us too.. Heh. We ate at Compass Point's Swensens.. Most shops were closed, so nothing to wander about.. and we went home. After successfully connected to my internet, i did the online tests. Couldn't finish up all and Syad kindly said i could borrow his lappy and return it to him on Wednesday.
Talked to Hafiz last night. We're not on good terms these few days, i must say. We always got into silly fights. We're not talking that much like we use to. I don't know where it got wrong. Was it me, dear? Sometimes, i just feel like giving up 'coz, to think back, u didn't even try to love me. And i go, 'why the hell should i wait?'.. And my heart goes, 'coz you love him..' The tears i cried honestly, wasn't meant for you.. It's for the things i've done.. Making things so complicated and ended up feeling down.. Didn't know what i should do. I'm feeling guilty.. I honestly don't know what i should do.. If i follow my heart, a person's heart will bleed. If i follow what i believe in, i'll lose someone i love dearly.. Should i just go and leave? A question that has no answer to it.. yet.
Has, you really make me speechless when you said.. 'He said he needed time..? And you believe that?' Girl, what do i gotta say? I'm not sure if i'm blind. But please correct me when i say, i don't think i'm stupid enough to just believe every single word he said.
And Syad, i hope you understand why i'm holding it back now.. I never want any of this to happen.. It just.. happened.
Trust me when i say, i love you.. But i can't do anything about it now.. Coz you don't even want me..
-You don't even try..-
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