readmeifyoucan.

will it be easy?

Friday, September 09, 201112:22 PM

why is it whenever i'm bored, you're the one i'll be missing?

i don't know why i'm still waiting.

i used to believe that we're fated for each other.

but i tend to think otherwise when i feel that you're into someone else.

i know i had to let it go someday.. but when?

yes, it hurts.

it hurts to know that i'm not the reason behind your smile.

my heart beats fast and hard like a drum whenever i browse your profile. (call me a stalker, i could care less.)

just to kill my sadness.

i viewed almost every pictures you have to stop missing you. (it doesn't help much)

it hurts in every way.

i know i have to let you go.

but why do i reject every possible man that could turn tears into smiles?

why am i still waiting?

i shall stop looking for answers and accept what fate has brought for me.

so long, my almost lover.

i'll never stop praying for your happiness.. and mine.

- ..and then i realize, you were never mine to begin with. -

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Salam Aidilfitri

Thursday, September 01, 20113:09 PM

I disini ingin menyusun 10 fingers memohon ampun dan maaf kepada semua sekiranya I pernah menyakiti hati sesiapa intentionally or not. Semoga this raya memberi rahmat kepada we all.

Selamat Hari Raya!

- Next time i promise to blog more. Today is sick day. Gotta rest. Enjoy your raya, people! -

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Baybeats 2011

Thursday, August 18, 20111:47 PM

Arajua

You guys really gotta check this awesome post-rock band! You'll simply be mesmerized by the songs the play and you may have eargasm listening to it. Trust me.

Come down to Esplanade and watch them live this Friday, 190811 @ 7pm.

-vgujh-

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she's back!

Tuesday, August 16, 20113:16 PM

oh wow!

it's been a year plus since my last entry.

sorry for abandoning you, i guess. heh.

anyways, i'll be back again to write up on hot stuffs that's been happening for the whole year of unblogging.

-perhaps you need to prepare some tissues too. heh.-

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turmoil.

Tuesday, June 01, 201010:35 PM

Bad news after another.

Dearest drummer's mum has just passed away.

Diharapkan dapat sedekahkan Al-Fateha kepada Allahyarhamha.

Semoga di tempatkan ke orang-orang yang beriman. Insyallah.

It really made an impact on me. I wasn't close to her but i know she's a very nice person. I felt really bad as i didn't take Ayie's situation seriously. Assuming that everything was sure gonna be all right. Poor him. I neglected him. How cruel was i. I pray and hope that he'll be a stronger and wiser brother, and son. May Allah protect him and his family. Amin.

Superhero haven't been online for quite some time. I used to think that ever since he's got a girlfriend, he didn't have time to go online. HAH! The fact is, he was having problems with his MSN. Oh well, i miss chatting with him..entertaining his nonsensical and irritating jokes. Gotta let him go, one day. heh.

So, i feel left out these few months. I've to admit. I didn't have anyone, and i mean ANYONE to pour out my happiness and sorrows with. Sad, huh? I've been keeping it all to myself. How torturing. I had no choice but to pour some, in here. It's unbearable. God!

Had misunderstandings with Kathy. I'm glad it's over. You're not the only one who feels abandoned. (:

Received a text message from Asri. He said he still couldn't meet me up to get his present and that he's totally sorry about it. He's going on course for a month. It teared my heart out. I may not know if i'll still be able to meet him the following month. I won't hope for more. It hurts to know what you've planned few months back, is still not happening now...for until god-knows-when. Well, i wish him well and hopes he reach to and fro, safely.

And... i'm gonna throw these tensions out at BDB's gig this Thursday at the Prince Of Wales. And of course, gonna spend some time with my BFFs and Fakhrin on the following week. Hope all of that can help me relax abit.

... above all, to be frank, i feel so unappreciated. Sometimes, having lots of friends can bring difficult and stressful times to yourself. I'm not saying i don't appreciate friendship. But i think i'm over-appreciating them until it felt like shit to see them leaving you out after some time. The worse part is, you've no idea where they've gone to!

-May the upcoming month brings better luck and happiness in my life.-

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Happy Mum's Day, Mothers!

Sunday, May 09, 201011:48 PM

WHAT A DAY!

a tiring yet awesome one.

Woke up at 1030am. Went to look for blue roses at the very last minute for mum. I didn't have time to order and stuffs before. So i went searching at the last minute. Lucky me, i found a flower shop at Tamp One and they did sell blue roses. I didn't have to be afraid of hearing them say, "Oh, blue roses uh? You have to order one, you know. 3 days before." -_-

Waited for the florists to arrange and beautify the bouquet. I'm satisfied with it. I was sure mum would be pleased.

So, as mum had no idea what i've planned for her on this day, i told my siblings not to reveal whatever we've planned. Told her that we'll be having a mini celebration at home and nothing else. She told us she was doing OT but ended up doing just morning shift today. Went on with our plan though. Reached just in time before mum left for home. Told my niece to surprise her by running and gave her the flowers. To my astonishment, she looked very amazed. I thought she had the idea of us having a surprise for her but i guess we're so good in acting. LOL. Treated her at Swensen's after which, another surprise for mum. A Montclair ring that she wanted so bad. Again, i was shocked. I saw tears in her eyes and i'm happy. I'm happy that she was very pleased with the gifts. Oh, btw, there's a video of her opening this gift and while she was doing that, bro did a random act by throwing a cherry on her which landed up in between her breasts. That was superly funny, i tell you. Have a look at my facebook. HAHAHA.

Last but not least, on the way back home i asked mum, "Happy today?", her reply, "VERY.", and went on hugging all of us. I told her i had the last gift for her. An ATOS Wellness Club voucher for a full body massage + steam bath and body scrub. Just for mum. It's gonna be worth it.

This is nothing compared to the love and care you gave. You've sacrificed much more than this.

-Love you, Hasani.-

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good moorrnningg!

Wednesday, April 14, 20101:21 AM

MORNING, guys.

I know. It's late. I can't sleep.

Had another pathetic argument with Superhero.

I don't know why.

At times i feel he's my saviour and the next, an enemy.

We argue about the things we can refrain from talking about, but yet we did.

Sounds childish, right?

That's how we are sometimes. He loves to piss me, i love to piss him.

He's just unpredictable, sometimes. Also, heartless.

He just say the things he wanna say and that's that. The moment he said something i don't like, we argue. Most of the time, he still makes fun of it when i was serious about being mad. And he still irritates me out. I don't get it. Do you?

Geez. Guys can be sooo... undescribable.

Again, he warned me about something he've warned me too many times before. And he knew i'm not the KAYPO or the Gossip-Girl type. He's being a paranoid or something. And it pisses me off. People who know me, don't repeat the same mistakes they did. Once i said NO, means a NO. And when i've said i'm not like that, means i'm not. And if you have insecurities or having difficulties to trust me, then just buzz off. Sadly, that's what i did to him. I've said my good luck wishes and goodbye to him. He tried to make me laugh by pissing me off still, but it didn't get me. I stopped from chatting with him. After a few tries of making me talk, he gave up just like that. Offline. Not even a word of SORRY. Such an egoistic man. Sigh.

Sometimes, i wonder. Is he a friend or a foe? Or maybe he's just a passer-by who attends to my boredom-ness on MSN. I don't wish him to be that way. He's my Superhero after all. And it means something when i've called him that. Surely must be a friend, a close friend or something like that. Does he even have a clue to why i call him that? Sheesh. I'd bet that's a NO. Well, i'll just carry on then.

p/s: i've never enjoyed hating you.

-Hating every bit of this moment.-

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